the end is near…

The end of my job, that is.

I received word yesterday that the negotiations for the contract I’m consulting on have been unsuccessful.  I will be out of a job at the end of the month unless my company gets another contract really soon.  No one is planning on that happening.

I am having mixed emotions about this.  On one hand, it’s not a bad thing.  I haven’t really been happy on this particular contract, even though I love the work I do.  Politics just gets in the way of the good stuff.  This could open new opportunities for me.

On the other hand, the economy is still in the tank and finding a new job will be difficult.  We will need to cut back drastically to keep current with the bills if I’m unemployed for any length of time.

Scuba man says that life is what happens when you’re planning for the future.  As two people who just set new goals 6 weeks ago, I feel like our future dreams have just blown up in our faces.  Drastic, I know, but that’s how I feel.  It’s time now necessary to revise those goals.  I didn’t think that was going to happen so soon.

I am a person that hopes for the best and plans for the worse.  I want to plan as though I cannot find another job soon.  If we cut back immediately and I find another job, we’ll still know we can survive on less money and perhaps pay off our debts and build up our emergency savings.  Or, maybe I can’t find a job making the salary I make now and we’ll have to survive on less money.  Or I won’t find another job.  The key is, we will survive one way or another.  I am not too proud to flip burgers for a living if that’s what it takes.

The big concern is making the two mortgages and, more than anything, Willow’s medical needs.  I know that we have been fortunate in being able to afford to buy our retirement home years before we retire, but now we have two mortgages and no hopes of being able to sell either house for what we owe on it.  The housing market has just not recovered enough for that.  I would just not feel right about a short sale.  I committed to borrow money with  intentions of paying it all back.  I would feel so guilty if I couldn’t do that!

I know there are people out there that would just say let the bank do a short sale.  Everyone else does.  I guess if that was the very last possible way, then we would have to.  I pray that it won’t come to that.  I will do everything in my power to not let it come to that.

Although some of my readers will think I’m crazy, Willow is even more important.  We will go into debt to keep her healthy and pain-free (oh wait,we already are in debt because of that!). She is even more of a commitment than the bank.  She is a living being that we committed to when we adopted her.  I would go without everything that is not necessary to live, for her.

Stay tuned to see what my future holds!  Oh, and if you know of anyone looking for an Oracle programmer in the Richmond area, please point them my way!  Thanks.

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11 Responses to the end is near…

  1. melsar93 says:

    I like the fact that you tagged this with emotions and fear. You seem pretty calm and very open when describing your situation – probably easier to do in print.

    I wish you good luck in finding the next job. Even if you are on the oracle side of the fence us database geeks have to stick together.

  2. Hi Seashell, I am so sorry to hear your contract won’t be renewed and this will put strain on your finances. Have you thought about going Freelance?. I was bullied out of a job I felt passionate about and worked 10hr day. I could not find another job because of my age, yes ageism exists in the UK and I was only 40 at that time. I decided to set up my own business just small contracts. I never looked back and this gave me freedom of sorts especially when hubby became ill and had to retire early 😉

    I retired early myself last year thinking we had done all our sums…wrong. The UK government then put up the age at which you could claim state pension. Life is so unfair but like you the bastards ain’t gonna grind me down! We have just learnt to exist on far far less. There is often a feeling of panic almost like freefalling without a parachute and the butterflies flutter in your stomache with worry. I then just look out to sea and this restores my Kama if not my bank balance

    Take heart dear buddy…things have a way of working themselves out.

    Ps I added your recipe to my blog today for Foodie Friday…thanks 🙂

    • Seashell says:

      PiP, that’s actually one of the things my husband and I discussed. I’m getting a good severance so I’ll have a fair amount of time to see what’s out there. We’ve agreed not to rush into the first thing that comes along and to look at all options. Right now, I’m just trying to get over the shock. I’ve never been laid off before!

  3. barb19 says:

    Sorry to hear your news PiP, but it might be a case of “new doors opening” for you! Sometimes things happen for a reason, and this might be your time to go into business for yourself.
    I don’t think you are crazy putting Willow first – I would be the same in your circumstances. You have a good head on you – you will come through this and probably end up financially better off than you were before. Will be thinking of you.

  4. Seashell,
    If thats what happens in the end, I think its for the best. I quit from a software company too sometime back. Life so far has been benevolent. There would be a way to work out your financial commitments. Just keep your eyes open. Freelancing is a good idea too.
    Love and hopes, Alchemist.

    • Seashell says:

      I think it’s for the best, too! I am surprisingly happy and excited about it. Scuba man and I have discussed the worse possibly thing that could happen financially, and it’s not so bad. The freedom I feel right now leads me to believe it’s time for a change and that change may just be out of IT. Thanks for the encouragement A!
      ~ shell

  5. Papa Joe says:

    Fear not Seashell. This is something everyone goes through these days. Being out of work, uncertain and facing the prospect of having to give up some of our dreams is rough. But it makes us appreciate more those dreams we fight to keep.

    I hope all works out for you well Seashell. 🙂

    – Papa Joe

    • Seashell says:

      Thanks Papa Joe. I know everything will work out for the best. There is a reason for everything that happens and I’m looking forward to finding out what in my future is the reason for this.

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