friendship or lack thereof

Isn’t it strange how we let friendships slip away?  In some cases, you can pinpoint why.  In other cases, it’s hard to pinpoint why.

There are work friends that no longer want to keep up the friendship if you or they get another job.  Rarely do these friendships survive not working together any longer.  Though, one or two become even closer friendships than when you worked together.

There are friends that no longer live near enough to visit.  At first, you keep close contact, but over years of not seeing each other, all but the strongest of friendships fall by the wayside.

There are friends that get divorced and find a new set of friends.  You still occasionally stay in touch, but it’s not very often.  More and more you can’t find much to talk about because it’s been so long since you have talked and your lives have gone in different directions.

Then there are the friends that you just don’t know how or why you grew apart, but you did.  Or there are people you see a lot in the course of everyday life that you would like to be better friends with, but don’t make an effort to.

I don’t have a close friend here.  I have one in Texas, but we don’t see each other but once every couple of years and we don’t talk much.  But, she is someone I can talk to about anything or just sit in silence with.

I miss having a close friend near.  There’s no one to have a girls night out with or just hang out with alone.  I have my sister, but it’s different with family, and she doesn’t live close enough to be able to do that anyway.

I don’t make friends very easily.  I’m a bit shy when it comes to people I don’t know well.  It’s hard for me to make the first move.  My interests are much different from many of the other women I meet and, quite frankly, many of them think I’m weird.  It’s hard to develop a friendship when you have nothing in common.

I have male friends that I have a lot in common with, but a lot of men, especially the married ones, still consider it taboo to have a close female friend.  Or, their significant other finds a close female friend threatening.

I am at a loss about how to repair a friendship where you’ve grown apart.  How can the first move be made without total awkwardness, especially if you don’t know why the friendship grew apart?

I know I need to be more social.  I need to have more people in my life, not just my social media life.  I have wonderful blogging buddies, Facebook friends, and long distance friends.  But when I need to blow off steam, there’s no one I can do that with.  I miss that.

I know I shouldn’t, as it’s one of the 10 commandments, but I envy those people who have a few close friends near.